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Holiday Gifting with Purpose

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  Around this time of year, much of the conversation in our counseling sessions surrounds the holidays. Typically, there’s an assortment of feelings associated with the holidays, some positive and some not-so-positive. Many therapy clients talk about feeling overwhelmed and stressed . Needless to say, we've been doing a lot of thinking about this stress and where it comes from. Much of it has to do with travel plans, attending multiple events, and dealing with family… plus all of the shopping that comes along with the holidays. If you haven’t started shopping yet, or still have a ways to go, your stress level might be up there right now. What’s in a gift? Whatever your reasons for celebrating or your feelings about holiday gifting, many of us participate in the practice of gift giving around this time of year. If you're going to do it, you might as well make it count and take advantage of the opportunity to strengthen your relationship with your gift recipients. A gift can ...
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Not Just Sex | 3 Types of Intimacy to Consider in your Marriage

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  What does the word intimacy mean to you? In the context of romantic relationships, intimacy is oftentimes associated with sex or physical closeness. In our couples therapy sessions and at our premarital couples retreats , we frequently ask couples what comes to mind when they hear the word intimacy. The most common thing we hear is, “Sex!” When pressed further, we hear things like closeness, connection, knowing one another, trust, openness, private, and sacred. So what is this intimacy thing all about? The word may mean different things to different people, but it definitely goes beyond sex! Consider each of the following three dimensions of intimacy in relationships. Emotional Intimacy This is the friendship part of your relationship. It’s things like how well you know your partner’s inner world, the time you spend together doing things you enjoy, or knowing each other’s dreams and fears. In Gottman Method Couples Therapy, you spend time building your love maps. The ide...
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